Monday, May 24, 2010

An interesting... and neverending-noise

On Sunday evenings, the bells at St George's Cathedral in Cape Town city centre are rung. And run and rung and rung. Then they stop for about 5 minutes. And then some dickweed rings them again. And again and again.

I do not appreciate this stroke-inducing contribution to my Sunday evenings. I couldn't give two shits that St George's is there. I couldn't care less who or what people do in that cathedral. BUT WHY DO I HAVE TO KNOW ABOUT IT?!

There are a few issues here.

1) I do not want to hear them. It has bugger all to do with Christianity. It has to do with them being incredibly annoying, and being run for an extensive period of time. If they were rung for 3 minutes once, I could cope easier. But nooooooo, we need to hear a few sessions of annoyance.

2) It is a residential area. People live in the centre of Cape Town. Although it is not a late hour, would I be able to go and have myself a small rock concert in suburbia at 6pm on a Sunday night? May I interrupt your American Idol by ringing twenty giant fucking bells outside your house in Rondebosch or Fourways or Umhlanga, for three or four session of five minutes? The answer is no.

3) Noise pollution leads to other pollution. In this day and age of discussing the green impact of everything, this constant ear-sore makes me close the window to try and stem its attempt to make me cut off my own ears with a breadknife. This means that the airflow in the flat stops and I am required to use electricity to use a machine to create ventilation. Yes, Christians, YOU are making me stuff up the environment and are contributing to global warming.

3.1) I also have to take pain killers as that clanging gives me a headache - and you know that the manufacturing of pharmaceuticals is bad for the environment. So well done. Kill the world with your bells, why don't you?

3.2) That eardrum-heammoraging delinquency of tune stemming from the St George's towers also scares the birds away.

3.3) And, in an extreme situation, I might have to drive away from the building in order to retain what's left of my sanity, contributing to that fuck off big hole in the ozone layer.

4) Before anyone tells me that Christians are easy targets or whatever gunk is usually written under columns about religion, I would have the same issue with any other window-permeating geraas at that volume - religious or not - at 6pm on a Sunday. Whether it's Christians, Muslims, Jews, Buddhists, Zionists, Sikhs, Hindus, Rastafarians or Helen Zille's bloody birthday party, I DO NOT CARE, and do not wish to know about it for that extended period of time.

How's about a compromise, St George's? Why don't you ring them for one session of three minutes? That way I know it will end (currently it's a complete lottery unless you know the schedule of the church) and can plan my evening around trying to escape it. Is that reasonable? I think so.


Mid-Thirty Misfit said...

I know I shouldn't laugh, but I'm absolutely hysterical. I know exactly how you feel. We stayed with Aunty Cathy when they still lived across the road from Dutch Reformed Church. Sunday mornings were always dreadful because those bells would ring so loudly, it felt like someone was drilling a hole in my head.

I must admit though, if I was you and it was a Sunday night at 18:30 and my weekly date with The Doctor was being interupped, I would probably be even less amused than you are at the moment.

PS Delport, CBD said...

St George's cathedral causes me a headache every Sunday too, living across the street from the church as I do! Recently, to make matters worse, they have started ringing the bells on a Tuesday evening too. That makes two ruined evenings a week!

Maybe we should start banging pots in the ears of the congregation as they arrive for services in Wale Street - community activism at its best!

On a serious note though, I have brought this to the attention of our local representative. We residents of the CBD need to let the church know to stop the incessant ringing - a few rings is OK but all evening is unacceptable!